


oh, how you remind me so

by darthkryze



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars: Rebels, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Banter, Flashbacks, Fluff, Force Bond (Star Wars), Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Master & Padawan Relationship(s), Season/Series 02, ahsoka remembers things and it is very sad, kanan understands tho
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-15
Updated: 2021-03-15
Packaged: 2021-03-23 05:15:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,155
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30050475
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/darthkryze/pseuds/darthkryze
Summary: “Don’t you get all snippy with me,” Kanan said to Ezra in retort, and Ahsoka froze.In many instances, Ezra Bridger, Kanan Jarrus and the rest of the Ghost crew remind Ahsoka of her own little family, lost long ago.
Relationships: Anakin Skywalker & Ahsoka Tano, CT-7567 | Rex & Ahsoka Tano, Ezra Bridger & Kanan Jarrus, Kanan Jarrus & Ahsoka Tano, Obi-Wan Kenobi & Ahsoka Tano, Obi-Wan Kenobi & Anakin Skywalker & Ahsoka Tano
Comments: 6
Kudos: 108





	oh, how you remind me so

It had been a few days since Ahsoka's encounter with the Sith Lord aboard the Ghost, and she couldn't stop thinking about it. When she and Kanan had reached out with the Force, she just barely grazed the surface of the Sith, but what she had felt was cold, alone, dark- yet surprisingly familiar. 

She couldn’t figure out where to place it, though. She had never been well-acquainted with any dark siders, let alone a Sith Lord. So why she was able to recognize it was a mystery. 

“No, no no- you’re doing it wrong. Here, let me show you,” Kanan’s voice rang out from the training room she was currently walking towards. The Ghost was docked with the rest of Phoenix squadron for the next few days, until Ahsoka got her requested mission for them confirmed by rebel command. She had sent in a file to look for Rex to Senator Mothma, and was waiting for her response to tell Commander Sato. 

If- no, _when_ she got the mission for the Ghost crew confirmed, she herself would be heading off to do some digging into information about Lord Vader. 

As she walked through the door to the small training room Kanan and Ezra were holed up in, she felt a now-familiar wave of annoyance waving off of Kanan, and mischief from Ezra. 

“See, it may be the right way for _you,_ ” Ezra replied with a grin. “But I find my method far more interesting.” Ahsoka caught Kanan rolling his eyes. 

“Ezra, this could literally be a matter of life and death at some point. Adding saber twirls while attempting to deflect blaster bolts could _actually_ be the death of you,” Kanan said back. 

“I don’t know about that- this looks and feels cooler,” Ezra retorted, a twinkle in his eye. 

“Lightsaber twirls may be the death of you, but _you_ are going to be the death of me,” Kanan muttered, and Ahsoka let out a chuckle from behind them. 

“Oh! Ahsoka,” Ezra said, turning towards her with a grin. Kanan also flashed a smile at her, but his annoyance with Ezra was still very evident. 

“Kanan, Ezra. What are you two up to?” She asked. 

“Currently, I’m trying to teach Ezra how to better deflect blaster bolts, but for some reason he seems to think he needs to make it into a performance,” Kanan replied to her, and Ezra gasped in mock offense. 

“Me? No,” Ezra said, drawing on the ‘o’ much longer than necessary. “I’m just trying to make things a little more interesting.” 

“More _interesting_ can also mean more _deadly,_ Ezra,” Kanan sighed, and they began to bicker again. Ahsoka felt a pang in her heart, one of remembrance and longing. A memory, faint, appeared in the back of her mind. 

_“Anakin, I hardly think now is the time for theatrics,” Obi-Wan groaned as he hacked at another droid, and Anakin smirked back at him. Ahsoka listened in, cutting down droids of her own, deflecting blaster bolts here and there._

_“Who said anything about theatrics?” Anakin replied in between swings, pausing to grab a droid's head and tear it off of its body. He made sure the job was finished by slashing through the droid’s legs. Ahsoka could feel Master Obi-Wan rolling his eyes despite him not being in immediate view, and she gave a small smile at their interaction._

_“Anakin. You just ripped a droids’ head off with your bare hands for the fourth time, and earlier you thought it would be fun to try and kick a droideka,” Master Kenobi said through gritted teeth, calming now that their path was free of droids._

_“I don’t see how that is considered theatrical,” Ahsoka’s Master said, and she found herself rolling her eyes this time._

_“Fine, but when you get shot, don’t come complaining to either of us!” Ahsoka giggled, attaching her singular saber to her belt. Obi-Wan nodded in agreement. Anakin mocked a look of shock, and put the back of his hand to his forehead._

_“You wouldn’t dare leave me!” Anakin said dramatically, walking towards Obi-Wan and Ahsoka. Ahsoka glanced over at the other Master, who now wore a grin on his face rather than a look of annoyance._

_“One can’t be too sure,” Obi-Wan replied, and the three of them laughed._

“Ahsoka? Are you okay?” A voice rang, pulling her out of her thoughts. She looked up to wipe her face, finding a smile plastered there and a single tear falling. 

“Yes, I’m quite alright Ezra,” she said to the young boy, who’s dark hair was falling in front of his eyes. She caught the glance that Kanan and Ezra threw at each other, as if they didn’t believe her, but didn’t say anything else. “Now, work me through what you two are doing.”

\----

The past two weeks, Ahsoka had been happier than she had felt in years. Rex, her Rex, was here, with the rest of the Ghost crew. He seemed to get along with everybody relatively well, save for Kanan, who was still warming up to Rex considering he was a clone. Truly, Ahsoka understood. 

She had missed Rex’s voice, the voice of his brothers, her brothers. In the time since they had separated, she hadn’t heard it once. It had been over a decade. She felt herself warm as she heard his laugh coming from the sitting room of the Ghost, and she walked in to see Ezra, Rex, and Zeb sitting at the booth playing dejarik. Zeb and Ezra were on opposite sides, playing against each other, and Rex was sitting in the back corner of the booth between them. The force sang with playful happiness around them. 

“Having fun, are we?” Ahsoka grinned out once Rex and Ezra had stopped laughing. They glanced over at her with warm smiles. 

“This is the third time I’ve beaten Zeb in the past hour,” Ezra says over Zeb’s grumpy mumbling. The Lasat doesn’t look happy on the outside, but she can tell that it’s just a facade, and that his force presence is radiating amusement. 

“Yeah, yeah,” Zeb says, waving his arms. “I wanna see you play the old man next,” Zeb said, and Rex grinned. Ahsoka felt an unpleasant flutter in her chest at Zeb’s use of words, but said nothing. Rex seemed okay with it, her wonderful brother. 

“You’re on,” Rex said, turning his grin to Ezra and switching spots with Zeb. “Just one match, or two out of three?” 

“Two out of three,” Ezra’s reply came, and he pressed a button, resetting the holoboard. Ahsoka found their good mood infectious as she stood by and watched them play, listening to their banter as the game went on. Eventually, she felt another presence join her. 

“He’s picked up quite the talent for dejarik since I taught him,” Kanan said from next to her, and Ahsoka hummed a smile in response. “Still hasn’t ever managed to beat me, but he’s beat everybody else in the crew multiple times.” Ahsoka chuckled. 

“Runs in the lineage, does it?” She asked, and Kanan laughed back. 

“I guess so,” he replied, sitting down on the crate next to her. It had been a while since Ezra and Rex’s first match had begun, the holoboard nearly cleared of pieces on both sides. 

“I’m happy the two of you found each other,” Ahsoka told him, heart melting at Kanan’s responding smile. “The bond between a Padawan and their Master is incredibly powerful, and can get you through the hardest of difficulties. You two are lucky to have a bond so strong,” she continued, eyes going back to Ezra and Rex. She didn’t miss the concerned look Kanan shot at her. 

“Sometimes I get scared that I don’t know enough to teach him,” Kanan began. “I was only a Padawan myself for a year, before the Purge.” Ahsoka turned back to look at him. 

“Don’t say that,” she replied. There was a whoop from the dejarik table, Rex had the first victory. “You know more than you think you do. And both Master and Padawan learn from each other, don’t forget that,” she smiled fondly, thinking of her own Masters. 

Kanan was still looking at her, as if he was trying to piece something together in his mind. He didn’t say anything, though, and neither did she. 

“What was he like, your Master?” He asked eventually. “We all heard stories of the Chosen One at the temple of course, his Sith Slayer master and you, his incredibly lucky Padawan, but none of us really knew what he was like.” 

“Anakin Skywalker was a lot of things,” she started with, smiling, the ship filled with the glow of family. 

\----

“That was amazing!” Ezra said enthusiastically as soon as they were out of atmo, turning to face Ahsoka. He looked quite disheveled, hair flying all over the place, clothes ripped here and there. “You fought them both off so easily, like they were nothing, how did you do that? I’ve never seen anything like it!” He continued on, nearly slamming into Zeb as he turned again. It seemed like her little battle with the Inquisitors was going to be the boy’s current focus for the next few hours.

Ahsoka found herself chuckling at the boy’s antics. “Lots of practice.” Ezra frowned. 

“Oh come on, there’s more to it than that. Teach me!” Ezra went on. Zeb went back to the corner to make sure that Chopper wasn’t doing anything too dangerous with the children, and Kanan, from the cockpit, rolled his eyes. 

“You’ve got a long way to go before you can do anything like that,” Kanan drawled, pressing a button, setting the Phantom to autopilot. “If you started actually listening during lessons though, it might come to you faster.”

“Not fair,” Ezra grumbled, looking at Ahsoka again. “Your defensive forms were so good- did Master Skywalker teach you that?” Ahsoka shook her head, a smile still broad on her face. 

“Oh no, not at all. Anakin preferred to go on the offensive much more, favoring Djem Sho. I learned Soresu from Master Kenobi.” Ezra’s eyes widened in excitement, wanting to hear more. “I use a bit of what they both taught me, adding in more of my own creations here and there.” 

“Master Kenobi had been widely renowned as one of the greatest duelists the Order had ever seen, and for good reason,” Kanan added on, and Ahsoka nodded. “Ahsoka just happened to be added onto a legendary lineage.” The man flashed a grin at her, and now it was Ahsoka’s turn to roll her eyes. 

“Please, you were in Master Windu’s line! You would’ve been next in line to learn Vaapad,” she replied happily. The discussion went on, the three of them talking more about Ahsoka and Kanan’s Masters. 

She missed them, her Masters. Ezra and Kanan went on with their own banter, arguing about who would win in a duel between Master Windu and Master Kenobi, and Ahsoka disappeared into her mind once more. 

She often found herself asking in difficult situations what her Master would do, either one depending on the case. Thanks to Anakin and Obi-Wan’s teachings, she was able to get out of just about anything after watching them for years on the battlefield.

_“Watch and learn,” Anakin said, calling some of the men to his side and leaping into battle. Minutes later, he wound back up by Ahsoka and Obi-Wan, the droids being too much to push through with his reckless tactics._

_“Are you quite done?” Master Kenobi asked from Ahsoka’s side, clearly unamused. “While you were gone, Ahsoka and I came up with the rough outlines of a plan.” Ahsoka beamed proudly._

_“Good! Everything’s going according to plan then,” Anakin said, and Ahsoka rolled her eyes._

_“Please, us making a plan wasn’t part of anything you thought of. You rushed in thinking you would get everything done on your own,” Ahsoka replied, and Master Kenobi shot her a grin._

_They called for the men to set up a defensive, and went over the plan with Anakin. “Good job, Padawan,” he said, resting a hand in between her montrals. “Let’s get going.”_

She could imagine that Kanan and Ezra’s relationship was much like Anakin and Obi-Wan’s when Anakin was a Padawan, the Master always chasing after the Padawan. At times, Ahsoka would take after both of them, and things would vary. That was what happened when one had two Masters, she supposed. 

“No no,” she inserted herself smoothly back into the conversation. “If anything, Master Yoda would win that one.”

\----

“Don’t you get all snippy with me,” Kanan said to Ezra in retort, and Ahsoka _froze._ The whole room noticed it, everybody huddled around the dejarik board caught her look of total shock and pain. 

“Excuse me,” she muttered, and left the room. Kanan looked after her, worried, but Rex caught his gaze and shook his head. Everybody seemed to pack themselves up and walk back to their quarters, but Kanan stayed to talk to Rex. 

“Is she alright?” Kanan asked Rex, and Rex gave a sad sigh in response. The old Captain looked weathered down, tired. “That’s not the first time something like this has happened.” 

“Well, I don’t know the exact facts of it,” Rex began, running a hand over his head. “But from what I gather, you and Ezra and everybody else constantly remind her of her old Masters. Remind me myself of the Generals sometimes, too.” 

Kanan didn’t know what to say, looking down at his feet. “What you just said to Ezra- General Skywalker had said that to her once, on the day they met no less.” Rex chuckled, remembering the moment. “They ended up calling each other ‘Snips’ and ‘Skyguy,’” he continued on, smile fading. 

“I think I’m gonna go talk to her,” Kanan said, and Rex nodded. 

“That might be a good idea. Ask her about some of the stuff we got up to in the old days, I think you and the kid might enjoy some stories,” he replied. “I think Ahsoka would like to tell them, too,” he added softly. 

He murmured a soft goodbye to the old clone, and made his way to the cargo hold, finding Ahsoka standing there, arms resting on the railing looking over the large room. 

“Are you alright?” He asked her, and the woman gave a brief nod. “Rex told me a little about why- why you walked out. Do you wanna talk about them?” 

She gave him a sad smile. “You and Ezra remind me a lot of Master Skywalker and Master Kenobi, and sometimes of one of them and myself.” She turned around to sit on a crate up against the wall, and Kanan did the same. 

“It was always the three of us- and Rex, sometimes Cody- against the world, it seemed. We were notoriously known for being quite the unconventional group of Jedi, much to the Council’s dismay,” she grinned to herself, eyes glued to the floor. 

“You must miss them a lot,” Kanan said softly, and she nodded. 

“More than anything. I’m so incredibly grateful to have Rex by my side, a piece of that family I had so long ago, but it doesn’t make their absence hurt any less,” she sighed. “I could feel it, the moment Order 66 happened, when my bonds with Anakin and Obi-Wan snapped.” 

“It felt like a part of you was gone, I know,” Kanan said sadly. Ahsoka looked up at him, startled. 

“I’m sorry- I must sound self-absorbed. You went through it too,” she said, and Kanan shook his head. 

“I did, but you have every right to still be caught up over it. It’s your grief, you go through it how you wish.” Master Billaba had told him that once. 

“Thank you,” she whispered to him. “After Rex and I escaped, I had tried pulling on the bonds, to see if they were still there at the other end, even though I knew it was hopeless.” She sounded far away, wistful. “Everything I do reminds me of them. Whether it’s spotting Master Kenobi’s favorite tea in a shop, or hearing someone crack a joke that sounds like something Anakin would say.” 

“It scares me sometimes, that I won’t be able to give Ezra all that Master Billaba gave me,” Kanan found himself saying. “I worry if I’m doing things wrong, if I’m too attached to everybody around me, the list goes on.” Ahsoka shook her head. 

“The Jedi weren’t perfect, that’s for sure, and one of the things that they were wrong about was attachment and love,” she sighed to herself, the Force swirling around the two of them in melancholy and remembrance. 

“Closing yourself off from emotion is wrong. It’s taking away our being, who we are, and we shouldn’t have done it. The Order shouldn’t have done it,” she continued on. “Our love and happiness makes us stronger in the Force, but not in a bad way. Not unless we use it maliciously.” Kanan pondered this for a moment, and nodded. 

“I had never thought about it that way,” he said. “I suppose you’re right.” He thought about himself and Hera, about how many times their bond- their love, dare he called it- got them through the hardest. 

“Ezra reminds me a lot of Anakin,” Ahsoka said, smiling again. “I feel like they would be terrible together- leaving the two of us to chase them after whatever they had done this time.” 

Kanan laughed in return. “I bet they would, imagine them terrorizing the Council,” he said, still laughing. The Force seemed a little brighter now, reflecting on the two of them. “Tell me more about him.” 

Ahsoka smiled again, brightly and brilliantly like she had that other time he had asked her about Master Skywalker. “Well, there was this one time…”

\----

It had been an hour or two since everybody had left the mess, the dejarik session over. Ezra was on a hunt for Kanan, following his presence to the cargo hold, and he stopped outside the door. He could feel happiness radiate from the Force, and he could hear outrageous laughter from the hold. The two distinct voices belonged to Kanan and Ahsoka. 

“Obi-Wan _never_ trusted him with that again!” Ahsoka’s voice sang through the laughter. 

“I bet,” Kanan replied, chuckling. Ezra stood on his tip toes and peeked through the window of the door to the cargo hold, and saw Kanan and Ahsoka, sitting across from each other, laughing and sharing stories about their pasts. Ahsoka reached a hand up to wipe a tear from her face, a tear of joy. 

“I say we leave them be, love,” a voice came from behind him, and Ezra whirled, startled, to find Hera standing behind him. She rested a hand on his shoulder. “They need this.” Ezra nodded in agreement, and smiled. 

“Yeah, they do,” he said.

**Author's Note:**

> hi, i hope u liked it:> your kudos and comments are always appreciated !!


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